Growing up is hard to do

So earlier today I'm on facebook and I see my old elementary school crush has posted up a link on her myspace linking to some guys myspace who happens to be a fan and apparently he's used one of her pics as his layout out so I'm like ok.....let me check this out......Imagine to my surprise when the page loaded and I saw a full page spread of her sanz clothing. First of all never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would ever see this girl naked. It was so much of a shock that I really didn't know what to do with that information. So I do a little internet searching and i find out that she's a fetish model. First there's the 21 year old mature part of me that finds the pictures rather pleasing (toned down exactly how the pic made me feel) but there was still the part of me that remembered the girl that I slipped, tripped, and busted my lip for. The first girl that I ever had any kind of infatuation for and a dude was only seven at the time and the crush lasted til I ws probably fourteen. The girl who basically set the bar for every other girl who came afterwards. Honestly if you saw this girl you would basically see the connection with every other girl that came afterwards. So I'm like torn cause the adult in me is hype that he came across this works while the kid in me is crushed. I know it's a little irrational, you know people grow, people change but it's just that it hit me like a ton of bricks. Honestly this is gonna seem so wrong of me but I think I've fallen in love all over again, well not really love since you know how i feel about that word but.....yo i can't explain it, I think she's gonna be on my mind for a good few days....I didn't think anyone could top Lauren London in my mind......I guess i was wrong.